


Broken

by seoulight



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-21
Updated: 2017-04-21
Packaged: 2018-10-22 02:20:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10687776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seoulight/pseuds/seoulight
Summary: Why is he keep on loving him? Jeonghan know it's wrong, he know it'll hurt him in the end. But he stay. He keep on loving him anyway





	Broken

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first Jeongcheol fic i posted online. Pls bare with me ;-;

Morning sunlight peek trough the thin white curtains. Dust particles dancing in the rays of the light, catching Jeonghan's attention. He was clearly wide awake, but refusing to move; thick white blanket up to his chin and eyes straight to the window. It's already cold outside and Jeonghan wondering when the first snow would fall.

He heard the sound of his boyfriend's shoes walking around their apartment. Jeonghan looked up to the clock. It's nearly eight in the morning, Seungcheol must be awake. Jeonghan sat up, thinking of making breakfast for Seungcheol. But right when he was about to push the blanket aside, the phone on the bedside table suddenly buzzed. Jeonghan took a glance at the preview messages.

 

_Where are you, honey?_

_I made muffins for us. xx_

 

It was Seungcheol's phone. Jeonghan shut his eyes closed and took a deep breath.

He _know_.

She's Seungcheol's secretary. Jeonghan doesn't know when they started having an affair. He found out three weeks ago and still silent until now. He don't know why. Maybe because he won't face the truth if Seungcheol choose the girl over him, or because he wish Seungcheol would forget her and come back to him someday.

But somehow, there's nothing changed between them. Seungcheol still kiss him goodnight and Jeonghan still lay his head on his broad chest. They still spent their night cuddling and talk about future, sometimes share heated kiss and leaving love marks everywhere.

The door cracked open and Seungcheol walked in. “Oh, you're awake.” He said with sweet smile, dimple appeared on his cheek. He sat in front of Jeonghan. Seungcheol caressed Jeonghan's cheek and kissed his forehead gently.

“You want something to eat?” Jeonghan asked. He held Seungcheol's hand on his cheek.

“No, Jeonghannie, i'm late for work.” Seungcheol smiled again.

 _Or because you want to eat muffins with your girlfriend?_ Jeonghan thought bitterly. He hated himself for still fall into Seungcheol's smile.

“You're going to office today?” The older asked. Jeonghan nodded. “The editor ask me to hand him the script. I'll be back at six.”

“Do you want to go out for dinner or stay at home?”

“Stay at home, please. I'll cook pasta.”

“Pasta sounds good. I'll come home at seven then.” Seungcheol kissed Jeonghan lips and stood up. Jeonghan's hand in his. “I'll go now. Take care of yourself, okay baby boy?”

“Yeah, you too.” Jeonghan caressed Seungcheol's hand with his thumb.

Seungcheol hugged Jeonghan and kissed the top of his hair. “I love you.” He mumbled into the crook of Jeonghan's neck. “I love you too.”

Seungcheol took his phone and wallet and walked out of their room. Jeonghan sat still. His eyes closed tightly, tears slowly running down.

_How many times you said that to your girlfriend?_

 

 

 

Jeonghan brushed his hair back with his finger as he stepped out of his car. His editor doesn't showed up today. _Oh God_ , he doesn't know how Jeonghan stayed up all night trying to finish the script for this book.

He arrived four hours early from the actual schedule. But that's mean he can get more sleep and that's the best part.

Jeonghan carried his scripts in one hand and paperbag in the other. He had bought the ingredients he need for fettuccine. Seungcheol's really like fettuccine.

The elevator's door closed and Jeonghan lay his head against the cold metal wall. _How's Seungcheol doing_ , he thought. _That guy probably giggling happily with his secretary right now_. He closed his eyes. The thought itself could make Jeonghan's whole body aching.

Why is he keep on loving him? Jeonghan know it's wrong, he know it'll hurt him in the end. But he stay. He keep on loving him anyway. Since the first time Jeonghan saw Seungcheol—in pastel pink hoodie and ripped jeans, messy jet black hair, chapped plump lips curved into a shy smile and beautiful round eyes—he know he would do anything to make him stay. Jeonghan just really love him so much—too much.

The loud ' _bing_ ' sound snapped him back to reality. The door opened and Jeonghan walked down the hallway. Jeonghan smiled when he remembered him and Seungcheol; drunk after their fifth bottle, hands intertwined and stumbled upon their own feet, kissing between giggles and bumped into someone's door. Jeonghan missed those moments. He will asked Seungcheol to their favorite bar this weekend.

It took him two minutes to open the door because of the things he had on both hands. He walked in, kicking off his shoes before walked to the kitchen to put the paperbag. But something caught his attention.

There was a pair of red stilettos, right between Seungcheol's shoes. The sight made Jeonghan's heart drop.

 

_No._

 

Then a sound caught in his ears. It's sounds like bed cracking. And grunts. _Seungcheol's_ grunts. And a girl's high-pitched moan.

 

_God, no._

 

Jeonghan need to held the kitchen counter to support his body. His legs were shaking. Jeonghan took a deep breath and bit his lips, preventing himself from sobbing noisily.

He know he can run from here and left Seungcheol, he know it'd be better like that—at least for himself. But instead, he walked towards the room. _Their_ room. His and Seungcheol's. And now, that girl was there. With Seungcheol. _His_ boyfriend.

Jeonghan slowly pushed the door. And he know he'll never forget what he had seen.

Seungcheol was hovered over the girl, both naked and glistening with sweat. Their lower body definetely connected, and their lips too.

The girl noticed Jeonghan's presence and scream. She pulled the blanket to cover both their bodies. Seungcheol turned his head, and when his eyes met Jeonghan's, his jaw dropped. “Jeonghannie?”

 

_Leave, Jeonghan. Run._

 

And Jeonghan did whatever voice in his head said. He turned around and ran out from their flat as fast as he can.

“Jeonghan!” Seungcheol shouted, wearing his trouser and shirt sloppily.

He heard Seungcheol ran after him and Jeonghan increased his speed. Just when he thought he had escaped, he felt a strong grip on his wirst and turned him around.

His watery eyes met Seungcheol's. Jeonghan held up his right hand in the air. Seungcheol shut his eyes closed, anticipating Jeonghan's slap. But it never came.

The only thing he felt was trembling fingers caressed his cheek. Seungcheol's opened his eyes. Jeonghan was cupping his face while trying so hard to held back his tears. “You're so handsome, Seungcheol.” Jeonghan whispered, trying so hard to smile. His hand brushed Seungcheol's black locks. “You're so handsome.”

His finger trailed down to Seungcheol's unbuttoned white shirt. Jeonghan touched the red lipstick mark on Seungcheol's collarbone. He brushed it with his thumb, trying to erase it. He won't let anyone else left mark on his boyfriend.

His shaky fingers moving up buttoning them one by one. “It's cold outside. Wear your jacket and scarf. I put your favorite black scarf in the top left drawer.”

Seungcheol watched a single tear running down Jeonghan's face. His heart broke into million pieces. Jeonghan was a tough guy. Five years together and Seungcheol could count how much Jeonghan cried in both hand. But now, he sobbed uncontrollably. And it's all because of him. 

Jeonghan chocked on his breath as tears wouldn't stop flowing down his cheeks. He trying to stop his noisy sobs, bit the back of his hand until it's nearly bleeding. Seungcheol looked at him with glistening eyes. He can't stand looking at Jeonghan like this.

“I love you.” Jeonghan said between his sobs. He took Seungcheol's hand on his and kiss them. “I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.”

Seungcheol wiped Jeonghan's cheek with his thumb, finally let out a whisper. “I'm sorry..”

Jeonghan shook his head. “It's not your fault.” He sobs, cupped Seungcheol's cheek with his hands. “Seungcheol, you are the most beautiful human being i've ever met.” He rested his head on Seungcheol's shoulder. “You're so handsome. And you're the person with the most angelic heart in my life.” His grasp on Seungcheol's arms tightens.

He took a deep breath, trying to remembering Seungcheol's scent because he know he'll never get the chance to smell it again. “It's not your fault..” Jeonghan smiled against Seungcheol's shoulder. “You always deserves so much more than me, and it's not your fault if you finally did.”

Seungcheol wanted to hug him and say _sorry, i'm sorry_ , and telling him _no, i don't need anything but you_ , and ask him to stay. But something prevent him from doing so.

Maybe guilt. Maybe his disgust for himself.

Jeonghan pulled away. He looked at Seungcheol's eyes. The deep brown eyes loves for the past five years. And probably the rest of his life.

He kissed Seungcheol's forehead. “Seungcheol, please be happy.”

And that's the end of everything.

Seungcheol fell down on his knees when Jeonghan walked away from him. He sat on the hallway, crying because he know he had lost something he can't live without.

Jeonghan ran although he know his legs would give up anytime soon. He reached his car and crying harder once he got in. _God, please make him happy,_ he whispered. Jeonghan wiped his tears with the back of his hands and put his seatbelt on.

He drove his car out from the parking lot. Jeonghan doesn't know where to go. He stepped on the pedal without thinking. He just want to leave everything behind.

And then something struck his mind.

 

Seungcheol was always been his destination.

 

Now he has nowhere to go.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for any grammatical error and stuffs :(  
> Pls kindly left kudos and comments and critics if you have some. ilysm guyz ＼（Ｔ∇Ｔ）／


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